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Writer's pictureApril Sosmeña

What Am I?



I am a being. A being that exists in many worlds. A being that seeks to know the truth within me but ends up seeing myself within the eyes of everyone else. I exist in a world both of doubt and certainty. In a world of mediocrity and extremes. I exist in a world of longing and completeness. In a never-ending loop of growth and regress.


I am both weak and strong. Strong because I could handle the disappointment of being weak. Weak because there are certain negativities that just go right through me. Existing feels like waking up to an appointment that gets canceled all the time. And as I wait for tomorrow, I distract myself with the things that I'm good at. Then I tend to fall in love.


I always fall in love. That's the thing about me. I always fall. Every. Single. Time. I fall for the things that set my soul on fire. I fell in love with helping others grow, even when it means they'd hate me. I fell in love with making others realize that they're so much capable of doing more. I fell in love with putting others first. I fell in love with learning and helping others, even when it means making mistakes every day.


I am an entity. An entity that is always willing to give. An entity, cause though I'm always uncertain of everything else - including myself - I am certain that there is a fire within our hearts that lights up when the time comes. And that light will brighten thousands of other people's lives. That's how I am to everyone else. Not an entity that brightens up their lives, but someone (or maybe something) that serves more like a "spark" that fuels up the fire within them.


We are created to have dominion. Not dominion among others, but dominion within ourselves. We tend to forget that there's life within us - a life that we need to nourish - to let flourish. And to nourish ourselves means making ourselves more capable in nourishing others. We tend to skip the steps that are necessary for our growth. But we need to take time and just take those steps, breathe, and help ourselves and others know that life is a never ending journey of learning and growth.

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